nothing special

Someone recently asked me if I am a romantic person. "Hell NO!" I replied. That was simply a reaction from my walls. I have built so many walls around this soft little tiny person, and I've stationed guards there with a set of scripted answers for such questions. It's like that weird little munchkin man at the door of the Emerald City. However, I have always believed in romance. I love romance. I sigh when I see couples appreciating each other in public. I have finally set out to apply my will and strength to being celibate until I find someone who is actually worthy of my affections. Now I have more tools, more strength, and the willingness and ability to just simply walk away from distractions, for my own good. I long for romance. But I long to be whole. So until someone is willing to be special, I am going at it alone. I'd rather keep believing in love and romance, than to chop up my soul in tiny pieces and distribute it like hors de ouvres at a party.